I have always wanted to have my own house – I guess I can blame it on being on Aussie. I haven’t really given it much thought – until recently that is… Naoki and I haven’t even really discussed it because it just hasn’t been an option for us.
You see, Naoki and I have plans on moving back to Australia in the next 13 years or so. It was something we decided upon way back before we were married. I needed to know that the option of moving home was available to me. Because seriously, at the time there was no way I would have been able to marry Naoki without that option available to us.
I guess now with Baby N growing inside of me I have started thinking a lot about our future and wondering if what we are doing is right. To be honest I am starting to believe that our dream of moving home one day is very unrealistic. As sad as it makes me feel to say this but I just can’t imagine it happening.
Why?
Well for starters although I speak English to Naoki nearly 100% of the time his English is not improving at all. He still can’t communicate easily with others. He still makes grammatical mistakes in easy sentences. And I seriously think he just doesn’t have the motivation to improve… For us to move back to Australia Naoki’s english would have to improve immensely for him to find a decent job. I can’t imagine him being a house husband. He would go crazy. Also, he loves the job he has now and I can’t see him being happy in lower ranking job.
Although I have a degree in accounting I seriously believe that I will never get the chance to work in an Accounting firm. Accounting standards and practices change constantly and being an accountant involves continuous learning. As hard as this is to admit, I know that nobody in their right mind would hire me -by then a 36 year old, a 15 year old degree with no experience – over a graduate who is up to date with all the new standards and practices. I am kidding myself to even think I would be able to get a professional job in Australia. I left Australia when I was 19 years old and before that the only work experience I had, was cafe work. I don’t have ANY professional skills…
So even forgetting for a moment that neither of us would be able to get a well-paying job in Australia, the cost of living in Australia would ruin us. I mean, to buy a house in Australia, even a really, really old house, would set us back at least $300,000 or more. I guess if we were to move to a country town in the middle of nowhere we might be able to get one cheaper but if I am going to move back to Australia than I plan on living as close to my family as possible. Renting is another option but still it’s expensive. House rental these days in Brisbane, even in the suburbs, would set us back at least $300 or so a week. Add on top of that groceries, at least say $200 a week at least (because hopefully we will be a family of 6 by then), we would have no money at all. We would still need to be able to save money each paycheck for plane tickets because we have family here in Japan that we would be visiting once a year.
I have spoken to Naoki about this but he won’t talk to me about it. He still believes that we will be moving back to Australia so will not even think about buying a house in Japan.
I blame my confused state of mind on the pamphlet I received in the mail last weekend. It was for a second-hand house right near Naoki’s work. From what’s on the pamphlet it looks like our dream house. It is a 2 storey house, only 10 years old. Upstairs has 3 bedrooms, 2 verandas, a toilet and storage area in the roof. Downstairs is a lounge room, a dining room, the washitsu (Japanese style room) plus of course the kitchen, bathroom and toilet. It also has a small balcony off the lounge room. All of that for only $180,000. The loan repayments every month are only about $500. It is cheap enough that even if I never find another job we would be able to afford living there and fly home (with all 4 kids) once a year, as long as Naoki continued to get his bonuses. You would never find a house that cheap in Australia… To be honest, this house might not be our dream house – we wouldn’t know until we went and saw it. I have no idea how big the land is, if there is any carports or anything like that. But I just can’t get the stupid house out of my head.
I would love my children to grow up in a house not an apartment. I would love having a yard that Milo (and the kids of course) could run around in. I would love to have enough room for guests. I would love to have space for all the crap that we have accumulated but can’t throw out. I could go on and on about the positives about buying a house now. But the most important is that we can afford to buy a house now - we have enough already saved for a deposit (and would still have savings left over) and because of the way the economy is at the moment, Naoki is not working a lot of overtime but we can still afford the repayments.
If we bought a house now, we have a good 10 years or so before we even plan on moving back to Australia. We could get a lot of loan paid off in that time, especially if we put more than that was required every month into the loan. Maybe if we did move back to Australia, we could rent the house out? Or sell it? I don’t know…
It’s never going to happen though – as I said, Naoki won’t even think about it. But it was nice to put all my thoughts down on paper per se.
*Disclaimer to my family reading this*
THIS DOES NOT MEAN IN ANY WAY THAT I DON’T WANT TO MOVE BACK TO AUSTRALIA. IF IT WAS POSSIBLE, I WOULD MOVE BACK TOMORROW… But with Baby N on the way I really have to stop being selfish and start putting our own little family first – and at the moment I am just confused to which path we should follow…
Oh, Nay… we’re on the same boat. Tetsu would love to live overseas and loves English and wants to speak it but isn’t willing to put the time into studying to actually speak it well enough. He’d probably have a hard time in a low paying job in Canada. If we stay here, we can continue to live comfortably with numerous kids and me as a SAHM as well as possibly look into buying a house in the next 2/3 years with the way his company is growing.
As much as *I* would love to live near my family too, it wouldn’t be worth the drop to low-income family. =( I also only have waitressing experience.. and NO schooling so… I feel your pain. On the plus side, I’m growing to accept this idea and am finally okay with the idea that I’ll probably live the rest of my life in Japan. Thanks to you girls for adding more enjoyment to my life here!
By: Khea on November 4, 2009
at 2:41 pm
Go by and check out that house, even if it’s just you by yourself. If it’s right, you`ll know. Just have faith that everything will work itself out. You have the time to make the big decisions, enjoy life in the present and everything will fall into place.
I`m moving to Japan next year to teach and my biggest worry is that I`ll meet the love of my life (silly, I know). I can’t imagine ever leaving my mom behind, and she had no interest what-so-ever in even visiting Japan.
By: Emily on November 4, 2009
at 2:48 pm
I know where you are coming from too. I don’t think my hubby could ever get a job that he likes or pays as well if we lived in Oz. It would be very humiliating for him to take any kind of demotion whether it be pay or in what he does and understand that fully.
Though, I never married him on the pretense that we’d be moving back to Oz ever. When he carcks it I’ll go but I don’t think we’ll ever go together
Buying a cheap second house does sound good though. Why sacrafice your quality of living for something that may or may not happen in 13 years time?? When baby N starts school will you still be constantly moving apartments and hence changing schools? Things like this need to be considered too.
You could always rent your house out if you went back to Oz? So much to think about hey? Good luck. Naoki may be willing to listen if youlist out the pros and cons of living in a house.
By: achan on November 4, 2009
at 3:03 pm
i say buy the house …. (well at least look at it lol) you’re “move” back to oz is such a long way a way … and i would so love to “own” my own home as well …. you can put pictures wherever you want , you could “paint ” baby n’s nursery a colour … it would be fantastic …. and then in 13 years time re evaluate !!!!
By: Kylee on November 4, 2009
at 4:37 pm
That sounds so exciting! I think you should go check it out?? It might just be your dream house!
Another thing I wanted to say is…even if you think you can’t be an accountant, you have lots of other skills! I’m sure especially the language side of things would be a great asset to an employer.
Seriously buying an already built house in Aus is way more expensive than building your own. We built because it was cheaper to do that, stupid right? But thankfully we could…maybe it’s something you could look into also, if there is some land available in the area where your family lives.
I think the pamphlet maybe came to you for a reason!
By: Kelly on November 4, 2009
at 6:46 pm
I agree with the others! Go and have a look at this place and see what else is available in the area. I guess Japanese are very funny about buying houses because generally that means they will stay in the same place forever. If you can get him to understand the Australian way of thinking that you don’t have to live in the same house fo the rest of your lives, maybe he will understand?
Sure, houses in Oz are expensive, but you are forgetting the lifestyle that they come with e.g big backyard, bigger house.
You are still young, you are also very clever so I’m sure in time you and Naoki will come up with a solution that you will both be happy with!
By: Katie on November 4, 2009
at 6:57 pm
Ohhh I’d love to pick your brain regarding this… I think Ryohei and I have no choice at this point but to move home although lately it seems that we would want to come back to Japan at some point in the future as well.
I say try and convince Naoki to check out the house! You might both fall in love with it and sounds within your budget for sure!!
Looking forward to seeing you in a couple weeks so we can have a nice chat about all this!! I don’t think you are selfish for wanting to move back – but since it IS a long way off why not invest in something like house! In the worst case you could rent or sell to make a little nest egg if you ever decided to go home
By: Sara on November 4, 2009
at 10:00 pm
I guarantee hub’s English will get better when bubs arrives!
13 years is a long way off! Loads of things will happen before then. What if your kids don’t want to go back? It’s a tough age to uproot.
The house sounds fab! What does Naoki do again? My hub needs to change professions. I need to be able to pay the mortgage, raise three kids and be able to fly home every year too
By: gaijinwife on November 4, 2009
at 10:35 pm
I agree with the others. 13 years is a really long time to put off buying a house over something that may or may not end up happening. Definitely at least go and take a look.
For what its worth, my husband isn’t marketable in the USA at all, he’s a musician with absolutely no English skills, so it will be up to me to support us, at least initially, if we ever move back. It is a bit different for us though, because I was never a SAHM in the first place and have been working continuously, so I’d just be working more back home. Still though, I know how it feels to have no idea realistically what you could actually *do* back home. I’d probably have to go to grad school before I could make decent money. That’s always an option, no matter how old you are!
You don’t have to give up the idea of moving back to Australia entirely. You could always retire to Australia afterall, or at least wait until your kids are out of the house and you have fewer people to support. A lot can change in 10-20 years. For now you’re in a stable situation and if you can afford to buy a house, I’m sure you won’t regret it, especially if you’re getting a good price. You can always sell it later, or rent.
By: Jessica on November 4, 2009
at 11:00 pm
Naoki`s English is way better than Shun`s- Shun never speaks to me in English but Naoki almost always speaks to you in it. I was jealous! Sure he makes grammatical mistakes but most people speaking a second language do (my Japanese sure isn`t 100% grammatically correct all the time)…
If Shun`s English improved he could get a much better paying job in Australia as the demand for computer engineers is always there and they pay SOOOOOOOO much better than here.
That said, I doubt we will move back to Australia permanently. And I am okay with that. I think I knew that when I met him but it is not completely ruled out for us either- Unless his English improved A LOT though I would definitely need to be the main bread winner. Not that I would mind that but I would prefer it happened AFTER the kids got to school if that was the case.
I say go look at the house- if you think you afford it and it really is your DREAM house and Naoki gets on board then go for it. If you have a house is the liklihood of transfer lessened? I know that since Naoki transferred recently (albeit not too far but still) that transferring may happen again.
I would LOVE a house but it is probably not on the cards for us for at least another 4-5 years. Mainly because we would like to buy land and build which is going to cost us more and the land prices here in Chiba, been so close to Tokyo, are much more expensive AND smaller meaning we would need to wait til we found a good deal on something a little bigger.
While land/housing is not always a great investment in this country it is still an investment. You could keep it and rent it out even if you moved back to Australia. Or you could sell it (but land values do not increase here from what I can tell, especially on second hand houses). It would mean that if you DID sell it later on that you would have a bit of a lump sum to put as a down payment on a house in Australia too.
By: Lulu on November 4, 2009
at 11:05 pm
I always hated it when big decisions came up when we were first married. We’re celebrating 12 years this month and we’re still facing big decisions. It totally sucks. So much pressure!!
First, make sure you’re on the same page. If Naoki really doesn’t want to buy house, then let it go (after your pros and cons talk) and try again next year.
Second, don’t limit yourself about moving back to Australia. There are more jobs than just accounting, etc. and if that is your real goal then save towards it. Set up a savings account with a high interest rate and just go for it!
Last, if you make the wrong decision (either way) it’s not the end of the world. I really wish we would’ve bought a house in Portland after we were first married but it’s hard to say if that would’ve turned out OK or not. What if we couldn’t have sold it or what if it was a money pit? It’s just really hard to know what would’ve happened. So don’t freak out. Take a breath and think about what you can do instead of what you can’t do!!
It will be OK.
By: sarah on November 5, 2009
at 12:27 am
I agree with what Lulu and Sarah have said! 13 years is a long way off and things do change! Naoki’s English will certainly improve when your children are around and remember Australia is a multicultural society that is used to people not speaking English perfectly!
So you may never work as an Accountant, but don’t underestimate yourself! Even if you don’t use it your qualification still counts as something as it show your level of skills and ability! You could easily get an entry-level government job paying $45,000 a year and soon after get promoted to $55,000.
Keep an open mind!
By: Katie on November 5, 2009
at 9:15 am
hmmm decisions decisions. We are a weird mix in that K would love to live in Australia and I want to live here. I think K has only ever holidayed in Asutralia and so thinks life there would be one long round of BBqs, fish and chips and swimming at the beach. Close but…. ;P
Buying a house in Australia- with interest rates and not being able to get a loan on contract employment- would be difficult for us. K makes good money here- not as much as he could in the same industry in Australia but then he wouldn’t be able to work in that industry in Australia without a LOT of English practice. I can work part time here and make great money teaching.
I also think it’s easier to raise bilingual kids in Japan than Aus as there’s a lot of English available here and not so much Japanese where I’m from in Oz anyway.
Whoa- that’s a lot about me and none about you! Sorry. Guess what I wanted to say is that life plans have to be flexible as life is flexible. Maybe sit down with Naoki and flesh out the hows and whens of the Australia plan and suggest an alternate Japan plan to compare? I think remembering nothing is set in stone is important, too!
Good luck and even if you’re not in the immediate market for a house it’S interesting to look around and get a feel for the market where you are. The more house you look at the more of an idea of what you want you will get, too.
By: fukahef on November 5, 2009
at 10:21 am
I wrote a comment but either it didn’t post or got caught in your spam filter.
Either way – we have a lot to discuss when I come see you in just (about) 2 weeks!!!!
By: Sara on November 5, 2009
at 5:07 pm
You know what, I have been thinking about becoming an accountant lately (as alot of my job is accounts and I enjoy that part of my work immensely) and I discussed it with my friend who is already qualified and her comment was that my age wouldn’t make a difference, they have alot of people my age (and bear in mind that I am nearly 10 years older than you so not far off from where you would be if you moved back to Oz in 10 years time) who were starting out as trainees having worked elsewhere/travelled etc. but she said that my only obstacle would be lack of time to study to qualify. With a supportive husband on side, you wouldn’t struggle with that as much as I would. Just wanted to say that you shouldn’t completely discount becoming a professional in the future, if that is what you really want to happen. You may end up perfectly happy in Japan anyway but you should know that there are always options when you are determined enough!
As for the house, you should totally go and visit the house. As others have said, it is always good to check the place out! I think the fact that Naoki is open to a move home is always going to be important. It may never work out to be possible but at least you know if you find yourself unable to bear life in Japan, the option is there and you will make it work if you have to.
By: Midori on November 6, 2009
at 12:27 am
13 years is a long way off..and buying a house here (if that is what you want) is not an unreasonable thing..especially since repayments are probably cheaper than paying rent and you are actually getting something for it
The more intangible side of it is that elusive idea that you (or Naoki) are giving up their freedom by buying into something. Just depends on how you look at things..even if you continue to pay rent and have the `freedom` to change/move..a lot of times it doesn`t actually happen.
Little steps..you don`t have to decide everything all at once, go have a look and see how you feel about the house and go from there..
By: colorbynumbers on November 6, 2009
at 7:50 am
Oh, I can really understand your feeling. Sometimes, thinking long-term really messes up the short-term. I really do think that taking a well-thought out chance is a positive thing. I never imagined I would be here forever, but look it..married, with two children and now a mortgage. Scary? Yes! Fun? Yes! Who knows what will happen in the future? Ten years is a long time, and I agree with at least going to look at the house. And if it’s not for you, then maybe your dream house is somewhere else. If you are anything like me, you never know what you want until you give yourself the options that you had never thought about. Good luck!
By: Laura on November 6, 2009
at 1:16 pm
I agree with the others that you should try and convince Naoki to go and look at the house at least! After all paying rent for 13 years can add up to quite a lot of money and then you are not even sure what will happen then. If you did decide to go back to Australia you could always rent it.
We bought an older house when L was almost one. We were living in a 2DK and it was way too small with a baby. I always wanted a biggish house with enough land to have a lawn and lots of play space and we were lucky enough to come across something on yahoo. We are a bit out of the city which is sometimes annoying but all the space and the low loan repayments are great.
I would love to move back to Australia one day but can’t see it happening. Hub speaks very little English and doesn’t even seem interested in learning. I would definitely have to be the bread winner if he went back and I don’t think I am motivated enough for that to happen
By: Nikki on November 6, 2009
at 8:54 pm
Everyone has already given great advice.
As you know, we just bought a house – we would have liked to have bought 2nd hand, bigger house, but found the market around Kanto is not good for that (you are usually paying for the land, and the houses are worth next to nothing, so even a house taht is almost falling down, but on bigger block is still more expensive than a new house, on a small block. It might be the same in other parts of Japan too.) I found I needed to change my mind-set – in Australia, a house is an investment, that usually goes up with time (although this may be changing too) but in Japan you are almost guaranteed to lose money overall on a house – because the value of the house itself drops so low, that you are only left with the value of the land. BUT we are lucky in that we can buy a house for something in the range of 2-3% interest rates, so repayments are cheaper than renting in a lot of cases, right?! If you are thinking of buying, I say the sooner the better – you will save all that rent money for starters!
As for what will happen down the track – who knows!?! We went into this house with the mindset that if things change in 1, 2, 5, 10 , however many years, then we deal with it THEN. For now, it was the best choice for us (cheaper than renting AND more room to move!!)
It is a hard decision, that truthfully scared me for a long time, but if you think it through with your head screwed on, you will make the right decision for you and Naoki!
Anyway, it never hurts to see what is on the market – go have a squiz at least!
By: tj-injapan on November 9, 2009
at 1:25 pm
Hi! First time commenting here. Congrats on your pregnancy by the way! It’s funny, because my husband were this close to buying somewhere a couple of months ago. Mainly because we need more space and thought the timing was right. We were organizing paperwork for loans, had an apartment picked out and everything. We wanted to buy somewhere (and still do!) for the exact same reasons you and everyone else has given, but went against it this time, and have decided to move but keep renting.
Why? Because even though the repayments might not seem that high, it just made much more sense for us to save up for a larger deposit. Even paying rent for another 4 or 5 years to get that extra money towards the deposit REALLY makes a difference in the long run. In our case, anyway. Thousands and thousands difference. And instead of having a 30 or 35 year loan, it’s cut to 20, possibly 15 paying back the same amount as the 35 year loan in repayments every month.
What threw me was the way most loans work here. I know you can pay back more when you can afford it, but the interest seems to be calculated on what you borrowed at the start of the loan, not on how much you have left to pay back. So the less you have to borrow the better. Well that’s the conclusion we came to anyway, for us in our current situation. If we had a bigger deposit we would have jumped at the opportunity in a flash.
It sounds like you’re in the position to be able to be able to do it, so my two cents worth would be to go for it! Good luck in whatever you choose.
By: kel on November 9, 2009
at 5:34 pm
We have been going over this for years. We really want to own a house and have been looking for a very long time. But then I think we will move back home… This summer proved to me that it will be years before we can go home anyway. And the timing is right.
Unlike in other countries where having a huge downpayment can save you money, in Japan we save money by not waiting to save more money. (If you know what I mean!). The cheap interest rates and a locked in mortgage with Flat 35 rather than a bank means that if I waited another year and saved another 100man, if the interest rates go up even 0.2% in that year we will be out money in the end.
We are probably going to be building a house this winter. We chose our land and are just in the house planning/waiting for the land (escrow) period. A bit scary but very exciting. It’s not all decided yet but getting there.
In our case we will be saving money by moving closer to my work. We live in a Canadian-built apartment now and could never go back to a Japanese one. We tried to buy a used Canadian house this summer but lost out and decided we might as well build. The government is giving a huge monetary push right now, with money for building a non-disposable home, for putting in a solar power panel, tax breaks for the first 5 years of your loan and more. Not to mention with the yen stronger than most other currencies it gives us buying power for foreign homes. It just makes a lot of sense for us to do it now.
We have applied for loans for 6 different places and this is the closest we’ve ever come. If you have any questions about loans etc. I have lots of info!
By: Medea on November 9, 2009
at 9:17 pm
Sorry just wanted to add here that due to our circumstances we could only qualify for a bank loan with relatively high rates, and couldn’t use Flat 35, which has a lot lower rates. So as you can imagine the figures change drastically depending on what we’d borrow. This was a big factor in deciding against buying right now, in our case. But obviously it’s not the case with everyone. Sorry just thought I’d try and clarify a bit more.
By: kel on November 9, 2009
at 9:36 pm
This is what I went through… Except I tried to move back home and make it a reality… and FAILED! Lost over $15,000 by packing up and moving and returning again. not to put you off or anything!
A bit of encouragement though… Riki first went to Australia with his school on a trip. He stayed with a homestay family.. couldn’t speak a word of english. He went back to Japan.. and decided he wanted to try going to school in Australia and finish off highschool. So, he moved to the Gold Coast at 15 with no english skills.. no friends… at you know what? within the first few years he went from no english, to fluent english. I met him when his english was still a little rough, but it wasn’t too bad!
My point is, being thrown in the deep end often means that you are pushed to learn the language for survival… and more importantly the survival of your family. I have no doubt that if Naoki was put in this position he would get through it, he has SOME english after all! Riki arrived with none.. and look how far he got! They say it’s hard to learn a language after the age of 10, that nothing sinks in… but it does!
The other bright side is that Brisbane and the Gold Coast have quite a few options with Japanese speaking jobs and Japanese owned companies. Riki worked for a Japanese company, another company that’s owned by my father’s friend hired Riki after that… His wife is the daughter of the owner of MIZUNO brand. You would never think it, but there are so many ties between brisbane and Japan in the work force… plenty of options for you both if you decide to go back.
I on the other hand have given up on ever going back.. Riki’s spouse visa just expired.. so we would never be able to live there again.
sorry for the epic comment! xxx
By: Sophie on November 10, 2009
at 9:15 am
Hey cuz…
Considering the time-frame that you guys were thinking about before coming back to Oz to live – why not have the security and luxury of owning your own home in that time? Especially if you’re in a position to be able to afford it. You can’t live in a permanent state of things being temporary, if that makes sense. But then, that is a decision you two have to make together
Love you, miss you heaps, and wish I could be around to feel your bubba kicking =)
By: zharatha on November 11, 2009
at 10:22 pm
WE WANT BELLY PHOTOS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i wanna rub the belly
i wanna talk to the bubba 
lol
By: Kylee on November 12, 2009
at 6:23 pm